Friday, November 4, 2011

While daddy was away

Daddy was away for biz trip for a total of 13 days. Thank God he is coming back tonight :P

We've been telling Clement that daddy will be back today. Early morning when he awakes, and it was still dark, he sat up on the bed and turn around looking on our King size bed. No sign of daddy. Only the sleepy "pretend sleeping" mom.

"Mama, 爸爸。。。没有。。。回来。。。(daddy did not come back)." That was his first sentence of the day. Gosh. Did he feel cheated??

"爸爸... aeroplane...没有。。。回来。。。(he actually mean Papa is still on biz trip, not home yet, in case you think that he says daddy fly kite, that's why not home yet)" Guess that is the most logical reason for him why he did not see papa on the bed when everyone tells him that daddy will be back TODAY!!

Haha... Guess that time I should set 'precise' expectation for him -> Papa is coming back TOMORROW NIGHT instead of TOMORROW.

Feeling so relieved that daddy is finally coming home, though 'home alone' with Clement is still bearable for this heavily pregnant lady, with help from my in-laws. Only thing I regreted was that I dare not remind him of "Sunday School" on weekends. Because if I talk about it, he will start looking forward and I'm not sure if I'm able to handle him alone outside with the big belly and slight lower backache coming on and off.

Anyway, glad that he was happy with the weekend activities we been through together while daddy was away - walking to and fro the beach nearby, playing Play-Doh, drawing with fingers using washable paints and so on. Besides, am more pro in blowing bubbles through Clement's fist during bath time. I used to be so bad in this skill that everytime Clement gives me a disappointed face :(

Daddy, you need to work harder to bond back to Clement lo. He is very sticky to mommy now since you were away.... :)

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Sharing on Parenting

Saw this in friend's blog, which she referred to from other blogs. Nice.


http://parenting.cw.com.tw/article/article.action?id=5020390&page=3
清晨七點十分,先拉開嗓門叫孩子起床,再急忙準備早餐。十五分鐘過去了,還沒聽到有任何動靜,眼看上學快遲到了,只好一個箭步衝進孩子房間大吼:「趕緊去刷牙!」「還不換衣服!」「快點吃早餐!」

面對一連串「快點」的指令,孩子的動作卻更加磨蹭:「我想再睡一下。」「我找不到運動服……」「聯絡簿呢?」場面完全失控,惹得媽媽氣急敗壞,忍不住發火。對許多小學生媽媽來說,上學日早晨,家裡彷彿成了戰場。為了排除萬難,準時送孩子出門上學,做媽媽的不得不繃緊神經,言語間不知不覺充滿了肅殺的氣息。

其實,只要把握五大黃金守則,適度運用組織管理技巧,媽媽就可以給自己一個從容的開始,孩子也能踏實展開每一天的生活。

守則一:完善的事前準備

「最讓我感到疲倦的原因,是自己沒有為生活做好足夠的準備。」蔡穎卿在《我的工作是母親》一書強調在照料一家人時,做母親的心會因為提前的準備而安定下來。

天下雜誌教育基金會祕書長凌爾祥很重視孩子的早餐,充分的準備讓她的早晨有著從容不迫的餘裕。前晚她會用大同電鍋煮好五穀飯,隔早不消兩分鐘就能捏出飯糰。「前晚先想好早餐要吃什麼並做好準備,可減少出錯的機會。」任職於貿易進口公司的楊玟莉會事先切好水果放進冰箱,隔天起床馬上就能現打新鮮果汁。

不同年齡的孩子,能做的事也不一樣。了解孩子能做好哪些準備工作,譬如挑選隔天要穿的衣服,或準備該帶的物品。製作一份檢查清單,列出書包、課本、餐袋、作業簿等項目,並讓助孩子養成睡前確認的習慣。

專家建議,在玄關處放張小桌子、椅子或收納櫃,規劃一處「發射台」,要求孩子前一晚將隔天上學所需的物品,統一放置在該處。出門「拿了就走」,就不會丟三落四。

守則二:把起床責任交還給孩子

不停催促孩子「快點」的媽媽,只會讓自己筋疲力盡,孩子也無從培養自理能力。「經驗是最好的老師,」某私立女中老師張心怡(化名)指出,孩子都不喜歡遲到的感覺,與其使出「媽媽牌鬧鐘」,不如讓孩子明白「起床是自己的責任」。她跟小六的兒子約定:如果鬧鐘響了,你沒起床,媽媽只叫你一次;要是繼續賴床,就得自己承受遲到的後果。

「孩子終究是孩子,有時就是會失序,重要的是,要找到把孩子拉回來的方法。」張心怡會跟兒子分析:「如果你一直要人催,我只好提前半小時叫你,這樣算起來,你反而少睡了半小時。」孩子覺得有道理,隔天就能調回正常狀態。

實施獎勵制度,也有助於養成早睡的習慣。家有兩個小學生的楊玟莉會準備月曆,讓孩子每天記錄自己睡覺和起床時間,發零用錢時順便檢討,很快就能看出成效 如果孩子的起床問題仍沒改善,應設法找出原因:是否太晚睡?睡眠量夠不夠?每個人所需的睡眠時間不同,除了滿足孩子的睡眠需求,父母也要先以身作則,養成規律的作息。

守則三:建立標準化的出門流程

「有些孩子不是不肯做,而是需要大人幫忙建立一套流程,」楊玟莉分享,她小三的女兒是個「需要軌道的孩子」,經常搞不清楚狀況。為了減輕工作日的負擔,楊玟莉利用週末將孩子上學前該做的事,規劃出一套有效的流程,透過遊戲活動,和女兒一同練習。漸漸地,女兒就能知道自己接下來該進行哪個步驟。如果孩子漏了某步驟,媽媽只需心平氣和請她去補,不必在孩子後面趕鴨子,也免去親子間的拉鋸戰。久而久之,孩子也從規律的流程中,建立對生活的掌握感和信心。

為了能準時出門,拿捏孩子的起床時間更是成敗的關鍵:先設定出門的時間,並問孩子需要多少時間跑完整個流程,往前推時要多留十五分鐘的緩衝時間。如果孩子動作溫吞,建議孩子把起床時間再調前一些。

動線的安排也不能輕忽。楊玟莉回憶,以前小孩總是出門前一刻才上樓找襪子,爬上爬下很耗時,而且往往跑到二樓又忘了自己要做什麼。後來她把孩子的襪子改放在樓下房間,孩子起床下樓,先穿妥襪子再吃早餐,可減少出門前的混亂。

守則四:早餐力求營養,但從簡
早餐,開啟一天的能量。中央大學研究員周育如專研兒童發展,深諳早餐對兒童生理和腦部發展的重要。在一切從簡的堅持下,周育如將早餐模式化,分成主食、飲品、水果三類,各選定幾種食物換來搭去,兼顧營養和效率。以主食為例,前晚多煮些白飯,早上微波一下,用冰淇淋挖勺挖兩球,灑些香鬆即可;或請孩子幫忙在土司上加肉鬆、玉米粒,放片起司放入烤箱烤,幾分鐘就可搞定;或把蛋加點水攪拌放進電鍋蒸,再淋點日式醬油做成蒸蛋。

有時,混搭也是種方便的選擇。先篩選幾項有健康概念的外食,搭配自己做的早餐,可減輕準備上的負擔。凌爾祥會用五穀米粥搭配7-11的茶葉蛋,或現打生鮮果汁配全麥麵包。即使材料再少,媽媽依然可發揮「窮則變,變則通」的創意本領。有回凌爾祥突發奇想,在五穀飯糰裡包入碎餅乾增加口感,竟讓女兒讚不絕口。

排定優先順序有助於提升效率。凌爾祥建議媽媽,衡量每件事所需的時間並善用零碎時間,做有效的排序,可簡化早餐的準備程序。

守則五:比孩子早起

楊玟莉回憶,每當和孩子一起睡過頭,全家就會陷入兵荒馬亂的局面。後來,她提前十五分鐘起床,先完成份內的事,等孩子起床,就能把重心放在確認出門的進度上。

日本人氣專欄作家成田奈緒子,也是兒童精神科醫師。她說,每天比小五的女兒早起一小時享受獨處的寧靜,是她忙碌生活的能量來源。


=====================================================================================孩子拒絕管教,該怎麼辦?
女兒今年六歲,她兩歲多時,我跟她講話,她就回我:「不要說了。」讓我感到很訝異。現在我告訴她一些道理,她竟然回答:「不要說了,不要每次都說是關心我什麼的!」而且她不喜歡別人教她,我告訴她:「這樣永遠沒辦法學到東西。」她又會叫我:「不要吵!」我這當媽的都不知道該怎麼教了。她才六歲就這樣,長大以後怎麼辦?

您為孩子的付出及認真、不斷思索如何幫孩子的精神,讓人佩服。但每當方法不彰,您可能會想:「是否我的方法不適用?」「什麼方式才是有效的?」當孩子回應您:「不要說了」、「不要吵」時,您腦海裡可能會馬上閃出「沒大沒小」、「孩子怎麼這麼叛逆」……等念頭。而這的確會讓您更想透過教育,幫助孩子,避免她誤入歧途。
其實您的孩子很有生命力,能勇敢說出她的心情,是未來很好的社會適應力。當孩子說:「你不要……」時,是有「自主」的需要,表示「我長大了,我想要自己嘗試。」人的自主語言表達,是從「你不要如何」到「我要如何」,最後在適當時間提出需要,和對方「相互協商」。為了幫孩子邁向自主語言表達的下個階段,當孩子說:「你不要如何」時,您可以緩和回應:「那你想要什麼呢?」聽聽孩子,讓她學習表達「我想要如何」的自主語言。
您真的是很關心孩子的母親,不過目前孩子可以接收到您的關心嗎?我相信若您能從自主的角度來關心,將教育工作交給「實際的自然經驗」,讓孩子從經驗中學習。在孩子有成功經驗時,多鼓勵孩子「已經做到」及「具體的好行為」,陪孩子享受成就的喜悅;若結果不如孩子所想,陪伴孩子的失望,讓她了解自己正處於嘗試及學習的過程,沒有成功不代表她做錯了或是她不好。這能讓孩子真切感受到您的關心,進而成為孩子繼續接受成長挑戰的泉源!(黃美淇 友緣基金會專任諮商心理師)

http://parenting.cw.com.tw/QA/QATopic.action?id=322&idType=1

Thursday, September 29, 2011

My dear toddler (22months)

It's been a wonderful journey witnessing the growth of my lil toddler. He has turned from a child who loves seeing you dance, listening you sing, following your story tellings, to an active bubbly boy who will dance, sing and even tell you stories to cheer you up :) How amazing! I still remember he loves the song "拔萝卜" where you have to keep thinking of which additional person to called to come help you pull the giant raddish. This was his favourite for many months till later on he liked "old Mac Donald" until now. This is a normal song that we sang till bored and decided to add new 'features' in the song, changing new lyrics, but still, everytime you repeat the song, it's different animals/sounds or theme. Challenging har. But lately he will tell you ahead what animal he wants. Even funnier, he'll tell you horses don't go "neigh neigh", but "tik tok tik tok"... haha. And he insist you to sing his version. Occasionally we will ask him to sing, he might or might not. But if he does, it's really very cute and entertaining.

Story time has also been a good bonding time for us, especially before bedtime and while we travel in the car. "Noah's Ark" is still his favourite, besides "Daniel in the Lions Den", "David and Goliath" and also "God called little Samuel". When we asked him to tell us Noah's story, his version will sounds like this: Noah - good man - God - build big big boat - rain... (and then we will remind him that he forgot the animals, and he will recap as follows) two elephants - 2 giraffes - 2 birds - 2 bear bear - 2 moo moo cows - 2 eagles (until he run out of animals) - rain - dove - olive leave - rainbow. If you interrupt and ask how long it rained? He will tell you "forty days". And you ask forty days and...? He will continue "forty nights". Cute!

As he likes stickers a lot and we found this at the Baptist Bookstore. It was his BIGGEST sticker project (8 A4 size).

Before:


After:



However, this sticker project is different from his previous sticker project, which we bought with RM10 from Daiso:


This one is re-attachable stickers which you can stick on flat surfaces like wood or wall. When it is less sticky, you can wash it and it is sticky again. Clement is so used to this re-attachable version that he thought that his Noah's project works the same way. He started peeling off some of the stickers. We tried explaining the differences but he couldn't understand. No choice, am currently keeping it at a safe place. Will have to gather at least 6 pcs of similar sizes poster to laminate them since the min cost the shop will charge me is RM16. Guess it is related to their machine set up cost. Therefore, we'll wait to see if any parents having the similar Mega Sticker project as this and would like to combine with us to meet the MOQ 6pcs, or we'll buy more Mega Poster Sized Sticker Projects for Clement (I think he will smile ear to ear if he hears this). haha.....

Recently I had my first online shopping at Fabulous Mom. Got this RM10 Little Bat bag for the little boy, and also a pink Little Angel one for his mei mei. His first reaction was - he can now fly like angel! Haha....



Check out his favourite expressions lately when you take out the camera phone to take his photo:



This was after he feed himself daddy's ice cream 'cake' (actually we bought daddy a tub of Nestle Ice Cream, lit some candles on it as replacement of a real cake). happy birthday daddy!


Drawing has no boundary, even on your face. Haha....


That's my little boy, 2 years old to be in less than 2 months time...

Monday, September 19, 2011

Getting more expressive

Clement is growing up so fast day after day. Am so happy that God blessed me with a job that require no travelling at all, and can have more time with Clement after work and during weekends.

Occasionally when we were rushing off to work in the morning, Clement would want to help carry my tumbler and handbag. Good that he has not attempt to carry daddy's heavy laptop bag. There were two occasions where he actually shouted at us when we were approaching the car. He ran into the house and showed up holding a food carrier at the gate later on, trying to remind us to take it to work as we've forgotten to. What a nice gesture and attentive boy. He really take notes of details, which surprised both YS and me. The caring character really touches our heart.

On Sunday, I went to have a haircut, after almost half a year of messy hair. To cut short the time, I prewashed my hair before I went there. Since there was not many customers in the shop, the hairdresser told me that it's going to be my turn in few minutes and my family member can just wait for a while. As Clement is in the stage of 'stranger anxiety' recently, he cried refusing to leave the car nor to enter the shop. Thus daddy and him stayed in the car while I went in for a 'quick' cut.

When done, I only realised that it was raining outside. Since it was not raining when I left the car, I did not bring an umbrella with me. After I entered the car with the hairdresser and her umbrella, Clement welcomed me with a big smile and hug.

On the way back, he said, "Mama forgot...."

He repeated that several times as I couldn't catch it the first two times. When finally it rings the bell, I asked him, "Mama forgot what?"

"Mama forgot um-bre-la... raining... Noah's ark..."

I asked if it has been raining for some time. YS said yes. And I asked if he mentioned umbrella to Clement in the car before I came in. YS said no, which he was also surprised at Clement's ability to express himself in words he knows.

At night when Clement was tossing in the bed trying to sleep, he hugged his Mickey Mouse. Recently he is very buddy with Mickey. (He even play wrestling with Mickey. He would free fall on Mickey and then tell us sympatically that Mickey stomach pain-pain, while rubbing on Mickey's tummy and say sorry to Mickey.....) Then we heard him saying, "Thank you, Mickey Mou... Mickey Mou, 谢谢你..." before he went to sleep. May God continue to nurture the loving and caring character in you, as gentle and merciful as what Clement means...

Thanks God for teaching us to love, through this little boy. May mei mei be as loving and kind as her ko ko too.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

The Visit to Logos Hope Ship

Yong Sheng, Clement and I visited the Logos Hope ship on 3 Sept, at Port Swettenham, Penang. On Friday night, we told Clement that we will be visiting the ship the next day. He happily sang "baa baa black sheep.... wooooo...." in response. Oh, how to explain that both "ship" and "sheep" are different thing though they sound similar?

So I started using "big big boat" instead of "ship", but on and off will keep repeating that "big big boat = ship". We had great time fellowshiping with some friends and their kids during the ship tour, followed by the book fair. I was happy to grab some kids bibles with CDs which are so cheap and nice! The songs are so lovely too. There were many other kids books and we bought some for Clement, not forgetting his latest favourites - the sticker books and some "Bob The Builder" fridge magnets :)

After a long day, Clement had a 4hours afternoon nap on that day. When grandpa asked how him how was his day when he finally woke up for dinner, he stretched out his hands wide saying, "Big big ship"! Haha.... Kids learns fast. Why was I so paranoid? :p He can now differentiate the "ship" and "sheep". Good boy!

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Missing in action for more than half a year...

Well, looks like I've disappeared for pretty long time. 8 long months without any post!!! Aiyo. Actually I composed a long one 2 months ago, but when I return to continue, only 10% of the entire draft was saved! Demotivated till now...

Probably have been really tied up with my 3M job as lots of traveling was required especially when I'm required to cover Ipoh as well since Jan. It was really consuming much of my time and energy travelling on plane or car EVERY WEEK for a total of five long months. Then, remaining time will be for a lot a lot a lot of rest to rejuvenate. Excuses... :p

Jan - it was my first 3M Sales Convention and Annual Dinner. Both took place in KL, Sime Darby Convention Centre and Le Meredien Hotel respectively. Nice. Thye actually hired event planner (The Jungle People if I remember correctly) which was not too bad. So glad am able to fit into the Cheong Sam I bought for the annual dinner. People told me that KL people will really dress up for events, and indeed I witnessed it, a huge difference compared to those few in Penang which I attended before. Imagine that, even guys also spent to rent costumes which suits the theme - Shanghai Night. There were few Malay colleagues who dress up as Monkey King (孙悟空), Na Za (吶咤), Huan Zhu Ge Ge (还珠格格)and so on (which not really matching the theme, but they were sporting enough to wear those costumes through the night!!)

My lucky draw prize, woth RM280 if not mistaken... They told me that usually the new hires will SURE win lucky draw prizes and I didn't really believe it. But it did happened to 60% of my dept new hires...


I think I have the most mother's chat with her...


The Technical Services Team Photo...


Feb - Chinese New Year, Wedding 3rd anniversary (wah so fast!!), and Valentines. Clement gets to wear several chinese costumes which were given by relatives. He looks so cute in those outfit - little chinese boy...



Apr - It was really rare to have a senior manager to organise trainings to the staffs. But in 3M, we were so blessed to have one who was willing to allocate his time to teach us how to use Microsoft Movie Maker as it seems useful to impress customers with the information, photos and videos we have. Nowadays power point is not sufficient or impressive enough. Short quality video speaks more than a thousand words in a short and interactive way, don't you think so? He is really up-to-date and techy though he's not from IT or engineering background. All he taught us was what he self learned during his free time. Salute! Well, free trainings don't come free. Our 'homework' was to submit a 2 minutes movie of any topic in 3 days time. Sweat... But it was a good practice. This is my first movie....



June - This is a special month. As it marks my last month in 3M. Till today I did not regret joining this great company with wonderful and talented people. However, the job was not really suitable for me for long run as it requires tonnes of outstation travelling, driving, flying (which majority are ad-hoc), and also the consistent fear of the need to stay overnight out of Penang for unresolved issues (again, adhoc). If I were not married, with no children, or if I am a guy, probably it would really fit me well :) Anyway, I do really enjoy all the friendships built within this 1 year.

The pantry room which turned into my lactation room for <1 hour daily. The mini bar was specially arrange for milk and food storage since the other existing refrigerator has some chemical stored inside.


The team of people whom I work most closely while I was in 3M. My 'travel' partners.


This was also the month where little brother graduates as a medical student. And also Clement's first flight experience. We went to Langkawi for a family retreat :)

July - This is another important month which I joined Altera, back to the company which paid for my tertiary education. Haha, the old scholars said, "Welcome back!" In fact, all UTM ex-scholars are now back with Altera, except for CCL. Everyone was 'waiting' for the Reunion Day if she does come back someday, and if all of us are still here. I really thank God for blessing me with this job, in this comapny which does not discreminate, at the right and perfect timing.

Below is a video I like. I'm not a crab person as I'm timid in heart one. Haha... When I introduced the little crab to Clement, I was also afraid that it might bite him. Thus I did not really let him touch it, just in case. As a result, he was also a little fearful at first. Then brave MIL teach him how to play with the crab...
video

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Wrapping up for 2010

Gosh. My last blog was in early Nov. And worse still, it was a copy and paste material, not pure TCM works.... The REAL last blog dated 13Sept. Imagine that...

What have I done these many many months? Hmmm... Since Malaysia Day, I've been restarting my baking engine, which target was to bake Clement's birthday cake. Those few weekends in Sept through Nov was pretty busy as once Clement sleep around 8+ or 9pm, my baking task will resume. YS called it midnight baking. Tried several items like carrot cake, steamed pumpkin cake (supposed to be pumpkin cake but oven was on Emergency Medical Leave for 1 week), custard cream puff, almond mango cake, banana bread, and finally New York Cheese Cake and banana muffin for Clement's birthday. After that I got a little slack since I have to deplete all the cakes since my in-laws are not cake lovers, and the cakes may not meet their expectation. Too much carbo-loading. Let's take a short break for now till I'm motivated to restart the baking engine again, maybe sometime next year.

This is one of the giant cream puff I baked. This was room delivered to YS who was babysitting upstairs in the midnight, fresh from the oven. It tasted so good that night, but in the morning it's not as good as this, when it was hot and fresh.



During the baking season, there were always few hundred of minutes where you stay idle doing nothing in the midnight waiting for the oven to "ting". One of those days I was introduced to PPStream. And my short term hobby started. Hahah... Covered 2 famous Taiwanese movies: 幸福下一站 and 命中注定我爱你. These 2 dramas I really like them. You may watch if you have free time. Anyway, as I don't wish to turn into a potato who quit doing anything but staying in front of the laptop every night, I stopped downloading movies and went back to my normal cow routine.

Talking about cow routine, am pretty relieved that I am able to fully breastfeed Clement till he turns one. Wanted to quit when he turns one to resume to normal human lifestyle without counting the hours daily, choosing selected 'suitable' oversized blouse to wear, carrying 2 backpack to office and business trips during weekdays, popping in multivitamins and calcium pills everyday..... But felt it's a waste since my breastfeeding process is so smooth and supply is still sufficient. In fact, turning back to 6 months ago, I was so worried my new job will affect my milk supply. But HE has provided, and more than enough for Clement. And my routines, HE has taken care, all of them. I always tell Yong Sheng that things always changed to be favouable to me, which I really thanks God HE continue to test and build my faith. Well, after all 1-2 years of cow years for now, is still very short compared to number of years I've lived. Besides, till today I still enjoy the bonding time we have during nursing, really. It is a rewarding journey and sacrifice.

This year is a precious year, some may not understand. Haha... If you guessed it correctly, BINGO!! Yeah, this is the final birthday which my age starts with a number 2. It's as if I have not celebrated my birthday for long long time. 2008 I was in Shanghai alone during my birthday, last year was just after my confinement and all focus was on baby Clement. This year am glad we went back to Malacca, had a birthday cake with candles on to blow :) Really felt very warm and no regret travelling back there despite the tiring journey.

Updates on Clement? He has now 8 teeth, 4 upper and 4 lower. Able to walk on his own just before his birthday. Now he likes to walk without people supporting him. We don't really mind him 'running' around on carperted floor but when on cemented ground, our heart pumps faster. He can do relevant actions when you ask him, "Where is your ear?", "high-5", "bye bye", "friend kiss", "one-two-tali-zom", and lately I teach him "gong-xi gong-xi" which will be pretty useful in 1 month+ time.

Does Clement looks like older than his age in this picture? haha... It's just illusion coz I strap him with adult seat belt on normal seat.




We are trying to instill in him the habit of brushing teeth in the morning and night before bed. These was his 1-year old official present from daddy and mummy. Cheap but practical leh? :p



My sister flew in all the way from Singapore for his first birthday and bought him this lego set for bath time. He really likes this and insist of playing it everytime he have his bath. Good buy!



How bout YS? He has been a fabulous dad. In this 6 months, I've been to Spore twice, 1 week each, and KL or Seremban (3 days 2 nights) trips almost every month or every other month. Daddy has been coping well and really proud of him. Good job!! Previously pacifier was daddy's "saviour" to put Clement to sleep but recent months he could just pat and sing Clement to dreamland. Really thank God for loving and caring husband.